How quitting drinking improved my confidence…

With realization of one’s own potential and self-confidence in one’s ability, one can build a better world. Dalai Lama   It’s ironic, don’t you think, that I used to use alcohol to gain confidence and as a result lost all my confidence. I couldn’t accomplish anything without alcohol. Or so I thought. People used to assumeContinue reading “How quitting drinking improved my confidence…”

Sobriety, the new normal…

The new normal. It’s all over the news. The world beyond COVID. It’s referred to as the new normal. The same phrase could be used for the world beyond alcohol. Normality is subjective to the observer. For years my version of normal was self-loathing and fear doused in alcohol. I was looking for an answerContinue reading “Sobriety, the new normal…”

What did I learn from relapsing?

“The only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing.” Henry Ford “Above is a picture of me, just before some friends and I go skydiving. I am 30 years old and have quit drinking for five months. I have managed to turn around my finances. I am in the best physical shape of my life. I feelContinue reading “What did I learn from relapsing?”

Loneliness in isolation

My mind can slip into negativity. The futility of life is often dissected in my thoughts. The awareness of the human condition and mortality can leave me with a burning desire to achieve… something. This bleakness of outlook is almost annual. It comes along like a possession. My thinking turns dark and I am leftContinue reading “Loneliness in isolation”

Time of reflection…

Walking through my desolated local town centre reminded me of venturing around the deserted ruins of an ancient culture. The branded stores that people identified with lay silent much like the places of worship of a defunct religion. In this quiet, it begins to dawn on me that society, or more specifically, shops, hold aContinue reading “Time of reflection…”

Daffodils; a symbol of hope?

My attitude of excess continued into my alcohol-free life. Where, previously, I had wanted to be fucked up as much as possible I now wanted wellness as much as possible. I wanted spiritual enlightenment and a six-pack by the weekend… I’d quit drinking on a Thursday. If it wasn’t happening yesterday then it wasn’t happeningContinue reading “Daffodils; a symbol of hope?”

Quitting drinking; expanded my world, and my mind.

Alcohol made my world small. I would fluctuate between work, the pub and home. It was like being a sprite in a video game. A character on Sims controlled by a sadist. Or a poor player trying to battle his way through a dungeon. Managing to overcome hurdles but never really advancing. Externally I agedContinue reading “Quitting drinking; expanded my world, and my mind.”

Feeling lost…

It has been two weeks since I ended my travels and those weeks have been filled with a sense of loss. I have finished what I set out to do and am now left with the question “Now what am I supposed to do?” A friend recently said to me “now you’ve done everything you setContinue reading “Feeling lost…”

My drunken dreams became my sober reality…

With the end of six months travelling approaching and my return to work slow tapping on the window of my future like a huge Monday morning, I begin to ask, was it worth it? A resounding ABSOLUTELY! People said I was lucky to be able to take six months off from life to fulfil theContinue reading “My drunken dreams became my sober reality…”

New year, new me?

The days leading up to new years eve were an annual tradition of mentally running through the seismic changes that I would be undertaking in the following year. From sobriety to relationships I would plan them all out. I would be convinced that the changes would happen just by thinking they would. That making theContinue reading “New year, new me?”