Sober and grateful…

For a long time, I tried to be something I wasn’t. Tried far too hard to be liked and accepted. Acted roles in a life I didn’t like to try and find something or someone who understood. But as I changed like the wind I was often left wanting. That exacerbated my misery. Cemented myContinue reading “Sober and grateful…”

Feeling the feelings…

The emotional stunting effects of alcohol are a quick escape. An emergency exit from life. But switching off the hardships doesn’t make them disappear. They are still there waiting to be felt. The more they are blocked out the greater they become. The intertwining of alcohol and problems is inevitable. Until the fear of quittingContinue reading “Feeling the feelings…”

My drinking isn’t THAT bad…

My drinking days weren’t a string of arrests. There wasn’t broken bones. There weren’t many fights. There wasn’t much blood. There were laughs. There was connection. There was chatting into the light of the morning. There was sitting in the dawn drinking cooking brandy from the bottle because everything else had been drunk. There wasn’tContinue reading “My drinking isn’t THAT bad…”

The good ship sobriety…

Hello, it’s been a while. I haven’t written anything for months. I’ve been swept along by the insanity of life. It all seemed to happen at once. Not a manageable trickle but a deluge. The chaos of closing my house sale, moving in and decorating. Coupled with uncertainty at work. Buffeted by the tides. TheContinue reading “The good ship sobriety…”

Poor Diet and Mental Health…

Tell me what you eat and I’ll tell you who you are Jean Anthelme Brillat-Savarin Over the years, I have experienced varying extremes of diets due to mental health issues. On one side was gluttony. Anything that changed my state of mind in a small amount must work better if I had MORE. More takeaways.Continue reading “Poor Diet and Mental Health…”

Exercise and Mental Health…

The last year has been overwhelming for many people. There is a growing mental health epidemic. Young and old are experiencing depression, anxiety, loneliness and despair at high levels. I have been negatively affected over the last year. Depression, anxiety and suicidal thoughts plagued a large part of my life. It was hard to keep going.Continue reading “Exercise and Mental Health…”

Staying Sober…

I haven’t drunk alcohol for many years. I used to drink a lot. Too much in fact. Too much for my body to take. To me, it was like I was getting one over the world. Like the kid smoking behind the bike shed who thinks he’s is a rebel. I wanted to rebel. AgainstContinue reading “Staying Sober…”

Worriers Anonymous

Worry is a chain of thoughts and images, negatively affect-laden and relatively uncontrollable. I’ve cracked it. I have solved the problem. The previous worry that led me down the rabbit hole of despair has been dismissed. The pressure has been released. A moment of calm descends upon me. It feels nice. It feels natural. IContinue reading “Worriers Anonymous”

Seven years of sobriety…

Wow. Just wow. I couldn’t imagine seven days without a drink at one point. Now, one day at a time, I have made it to seven years. Has it been easy? Of course not. Has it been constant highs and euphoria? Nope. Has it been worth it? Absolutely. I had no idea what to expectContinue reading “Seven years of sobriety…”

Are you looking for inspiration…

Are you looking for some inspiration? Are you trying to find a slither of light amongst the darkness? Well my friend Kaz who writes the wonderful blog Home | A Brindian in London (wixsite.com), asked me to share my story with him. I talk about my journey through mental health and reaching out for help,Continue reading “Are you looking for inspiration…”