There’s a light at the end of the tunnel…

I was painfully shy when I was younger to the point that it was debilitating. I always dreamed of performing on stage but the thought of actually doing it brought me to a standstill. My parents would encourage me to try but I would refuse. When I found alcohol, I believed it to be aContinue reading “There’s a light at the end of the tunnel…”

How to cultivate a Positive Inner World!

It’s strange how things change. Years ago, I did anything to not have to be inside my head because it was a nasty place to be. Full of ruthless diatribes and words barbed for the sole purposes of hurting. It was a nasty neighbourhood that one day I chose to face. I didn’t think itContinue reading “How to cultivate a Positive Inner World!”

The fear of missing out

It’s Friday night and I’m in a hostel in Santa Monica. I am alone because everyone in the hostel has gone out drinking… Rewind… It is Friday night and I am in a hostel in Santa Monica. I am alone but not because everyone in the hostel is out drinking. I am laid in bedContinue reading “The fear of missing out”

Looking for answers in Tikal but finding more questions…

It was once said that “writing is easy. All you have to do is sit at a typewriter and bleed.” Or something to that effect. I guess then that this is me searching for a vein. Searching for some beauty to pour onto paper. Or anything to express… something. The lack of routine, it painsContinue reading “Looking for answers in Tikal but finding more questions…”

Sobriety; The greatest investment I ever made…

My expectations in early sobriety were that my life was over. That I would don my retirement slippers, buy a pipe and rock myself to a slow death reminiscing about the “Glory days” of old. It wasn’t much of a proposition if I’m honest but it seemed a damn sight more promising than the roadContinue reading “Sobriety; The greatest investment I ever made…”

The Clarity of Sobriety

When I drank alcohol, I stumbled through life trying to survive. All I saw was the route to where I needed to get to. Anything outside of this was extra brain energy that I couldn’t spare. I was running on empty, always. The hangovers hung heavy, this, coupled with the shame that I felt keptContinue reading “The Clarity of Sobriety”

Around the world in 180 days…

Today I haven’t had a drink for 1927 days. Tomorrow I embark on 180 days of travelling. If you had told me 1928 days ago that this is where I would have ended up I wouldn’t have believed you. I didn’t expect this. Shit, I didn’t even expect to stop drinking. I’d wanted to butContinue reading “Around the world in 180 days…”

Pursuing happiness through consumption. Finding contentment in sobriety.

When I drank I was often physically sick. I have been so sick from drinking that I have rolled up the mat from around the bottom of the toilet and used it as a pillow because I didn’t want to be too far away from the bathroom. I would wake up feeling a sinking feeling ofContinue reading “Pursuing happiness through consumption. Finding contentment in sobriety.”

Quitting drinking; Pros and Cons

Let me start by saying that these are in my experience. Some of them are shared with people I have met and some of them aren’t. Not everybody has the same experience but I have never met one long term sober person who regretted doing so, that is a recurring theme. I’ll start with theContinue reading “Quitting drinking; Pros and Cons”

Stories from Sobriety – Bangkok and the number 11:11

I had spent the first two years of my sobriety, focusing on staying sober, paying off debt and getting ready to walk the El Camino de Santiago. After I had accomplished this, I felt lost. Like I was drifting through life with no purpose. This wasn’t helped by the fact it was November in theContinue reading “Stories from Sobriety – Bangkok and the number 11:11”