A decade after seeking help

It gets easier as I go along. The worries that used bounce frantically around my mind at night keeping me awake, no longer show up. I never thought I would be free from this. I never thought I would be free from the ominous depression that hung on me like a lead life jacket. TheContinue reading “A decade after seeking help”

Sobriety; The greatest investment I ever made…

My expectations in early sobriety were that my life was over. That I would don my retirement slippers, buy a pipe and rock myself to a slow death reminiscing about the “Glory days” of old. It wasn’t much of a proposition if I’m honest but it seemed a damn sight more promising than the roadContinue reading “Sobriety; The greatest investment I ever made…”

There’s still time to change the road you’re on…

There’s still time to change the road your on. That was the line from the iconic Led Zeppelin song “Stairway to Heaven,” that accompanied the delectable sight of the Grand Teton Mountain range as we toured through the USA. It had so much meaning because I may have been 3000 miles from home but, emotionally, IContinue reading “There’s still time to change the road you’re on…”

The Clarity of Sobriety

When I drank alcohol, I stumbled through life trying to survive. All I saw was the route to where I needed to get to. Anything outside of this was extra brain energy that I couldn’t spare. I was running on empty, always. The hangovers hung heavy, this, coupled with the shame that I felt keptContinue reading “The Clarity of Sobriety”

Alcohol or Life?

I was lucky. Quitting drinking was easy for me. It was easy because I was convinced I would die if I carried on. That’s where it took me, drinking. It took me to the hospital, the pit of despair and to isolation. When people used to ask me why I drank so much I wouldContinue reading “Alcohol or Life?”

Overcoming Boredom and Fear in Sobriety

I spent most of my nights in the pub. Duped by some ludicrous delusion. The promise of greater things lead me to the trap. Every night I would fall for it. The next day I would vow not to fall for it again. Yet with symptoms similar to amnesia I would stagger back, thinking thisContinue reading “Overcoming Boredom and Fear in Sobriety”

Whose life is it anyway? – A caffeine inspired rant!

All our energy is spent for the purpose of getting what we want, and most people never question the premise of this activity: that they know their true wants. They do not stop to think whether the aims they are pursuing are something they themselves want. In school they want to have good marks, asContinue reading “Whose life is it anyway? – A caffeine inspired rant!”

When I noticed alcohol had stopped working…

“What are you doing?” asked the barmaid.  What I was doing was staring into the nearly empty glass in my hand. “Thinking,” was my reply. “What about?” she asked. “Nothing important. Can I have another pint?” I said, before finishing the remainder of the lager in my glass. The barmaid brought the drink over andContinue reading “When I noticed alcohol had stopped working…”